I realized today, in a Sundaze, that there isn't enough paranoia on Joeuser. With so many different characters contributing any random thought that they desire, there seems to be a lack of wild accusations and heresay. Now some my say, that Joeuser is full of outrageous conspiracies involving Iraq, 9/11, or pretty much anything tied to Bush. This could in fact be true, since I never really dip into the politics postings (I really on Jon Stewart to tell me what's important), but these aren't true conspiracy theories.
A true conspiracy theory, is wrapped around an almost impossible outcome. Sadly, I can't think of any emaples to give you right now, except for lame-ass ideas like Ralph Nader continuing to stay in the race, because he has already planned direct attacks on the other politicians involving blackmail, alleged scandals, and an assassination attempt. Or maybe a large group of psychiatrists had Frasier cancelled because it portrayed them poorly, and divulged too much information about the psychiatric profession. This group blackmailed the NBC executives into cancelling the show, in fear that they would break the doctor/patient privilege, and air all of the CEOs' and broadcasters' dirty laundry.
Ya know. Shit like that. Maybe Area 51 does exist, and in fact a spaceship did crash there, but instead of horrible experiments and tests being performed, that is where our latest technology is spawned from. Maybe Area 51 is developing technology that will be utilised in the future, but one of the low-level workers feels this information should be shared with the public, so he writes a short story that can be transormed into a movie to warn us. What if Minority Report was our warning that in 10 years there would be retinal scans everywhere, and that we should start to fight for our privacy now?
I think I'm just too tired. I got home at 2:30am last night, and stay up til 5am to watch Finding Nemo. It was excellent. I love those movies where I can watch a great movie but still take 20 minutes to realize that the fish named Gill was voiced by Willem Dafoe. Funny movie, very touching, ending was a little abrupt, and I loved it. If the movie had done one of those cinematic pans, which would trickle and fade into a final shot, before fading to black, I would have been so disappointed and bored. I was so happy when "THE END" popped up. So colourful, and crisp. While it wasn't as fun to watch as Toy Story, that might have been because the whole paranoia of "this is what fish do when your not looking," is not quite as creepy as "when you leave your room, your toys come alive."
If toys were secretly alive, that would be one helluva fucking conspiracy. Imagine if Nader sent a teddy bear to one of the security gaurds at the white house, to give to his daughter, but that teddy bear turned out to be a secret assassin, that would kill Bush to let Nader in office, in return for some deal to shut down Toys R' Us across the globe. Or as the toys put it, "The Family Breaker." 30 Barbie sisters live together in happiness but are then ripped apart to live in anonymous houses, in sadness.
I wonder where my Batman Gloves brother is.