Well it’s 2004 and I’ve decided, after careful deliberation, what my resolutions will be for this year. Some are very wise, some are foolish, and one involves Taco Bell, the restaurant of the future. (Well at least after the franchise wars that is.) So let’s get right into it. Number 1 - To stop smoking. I’ve been off an on for a couple of years, but have decided that if I don’t quit this before I can legally buy them, I’m screwed. Number 2 - To have my acne suffer total annihilation. Even the slightest trace will not do. It’s time to end this. Number 3 - To get a full-time job for my post-Leaside High life. Gots to make da money! Number 4 - To eat at Taco Bell. It’s been so long, and now that the one across from the Brass Rail is gone, and the one down the street from the Hard Rock Café is becoming a Money Mart, I fell I must venture out to the depths of the Scarborough Town Centre. After taking that trip on the RT to see School of Rock, this trip is definetely worthy of a resolution. Number 5 - Be more understanding towards redundancy. Apparently, it’s not going anywhere, much to my dismay. This will probably be the most difficult resolution to keep, and will probably be discarded in a few days. It’s like fuckin kryptonite, and Kal-El I am not. Number 6 - Fix my sleeping patterns. Currently I am waking up at 2pm tired as hell, since at 5am I am WIDE AWAKE! I have no problem with the peace of the night, but being nocturnal and going to school do not mix. I can vouch. My medals of bravery are hanging valiantly beneath my eyes. Number 7 - Watch 1 movie a week and read 1 book a month MINIMUM!
There will probably be later additions to this list, but for now. All I can think of is WILL THIS MIGRAINE EVER LEAVE! Oooo too loud! Maybe I’ll go run over some Cubans on my Vespa of Death, or travel through the valleys of Tatooine, killing Tusken Raiders with a fury of lightning bolts and manhandling Jawas with the awesome choking power of the Dark Side. Lord how I love to shake them like rag dolls. I belong on the Dark Side. Side note: Tavian and Master Kyle were no match for my determination and “anger” as I steam-rolled through the tomb of Marka Ragnos. The scepter is now mine! Imagine, I could have reduced that entire last paragraph to, “Maybe I’ll go play a video game.”
Wow! Britney got drunk and married her childhood friend in Vegas last night! Apparently a bellboy walked her down the aisle. Too bad for her friend though. I’m thinking he was also pissed at the time and regrets what he did, OR he was sober and is now pissed because it seems Britney has already taken action for an annulement. I’m Bob Goen.
I need a shower.